Cine Machine Gun

Movie reviews and controversy with a vengeance
The absolute aftermath of cinematic experience
Only the Worst of the Worst

Read & Weep

05/03/2009

Wanted (2008)


Yeah girls... I wanna do things to James McAvoy too... Not really things - just one: dissuade him from making ANY more movies! But discouraging an untalented cute-face is one thing and discouraging a whole industry from making such idiotic, mindless, action flicks is way different.
Totally one of us city boy, turns into a mystical super hitman by fate and Angelinic providence in a movie that tries to be realistic by not trying at all, funny and engaging by being silly and preposterous. And no guys, it can not succeed as an action movie parody because parodies are usually really smart and humoristic.
Usually.
But what the hell is this? Have you ever seen more improbably ridiculous physics? No. More recurring, boring, fake special effects and situations? Not all in one movie alright. A more empty script full of cliché characters not even worthy in passing directly to the action figure industry? Probably not. Have you ever seen Jolie looking better? I think yes, but she can as well take this as a compliment.
This movie is a great example of extravagant nothingness in its purest form. A bullet train through our brain. Even Freeman's voice and posture couldn't have saved this one. WHAT THE HELL WERE YOU THINKING AFTER THE DARK KNIGHT MORGAN?? The only thing wanted here is Jolie and you can find her in better overall shape elsewhere.
This is just what happens when a director used to overly masturbate watching the Matrix movies in three screens simultaneously.

P.P.S. James you know how much I don't like you, but you were suprisingly good in the Last King of Scotland. Way to go lad!

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